christina spivak


smoke fades down around
curling up like touch and sound
remembering to my daytime mind
secrets in the dark designed
last night like some foreign land
cigarette daydreams in my hand

sick is the fix
the need and the know
the perfect perversion
secret and slow

I
disrupt
the flow
destructive, fucked
I self-destruct

Corrupt cold lifeless
illusion of a man
crying into
your beer
tonight you killed me again.

"So you dig feet," she said
right on
much can be told
in the curve of the arch
the splash of painted nail
softly rounded heel
"Is that so?", she laughed
for she was a very smart girl
and had very long toes herself.


Blood and Bone
shatters
I imagine patterns
it might make
on silent walls
i'm afraid
of courses i may take
of thoughts that scatter spattered
like the patterns
it might make


skin cringe
don't drift away
this way
she kissed me
and my lips
still taste
of metal and smoke
she is so
different now
so gone inside
I am afraid to die
so am I


Does the clock
watched stop 
winding down
like life expired
I'm so tired
and i'm finding
life like time
when watched
rewinding


Click
like
light switch
burst forth
thick through
cloud cracks
full on face
fell morning
day


T.V. static snow trip
picture slips flips
up like rising
horizons
what do they mean?
these blips on my screen
rip skipping the message
i'm trying to get


locked out of free flow
silence
the words must fumble
forward
but I am cut
and stumble
circling
one thought over


the demon speaks
of blackest dread
tender blasphemy
god is dead
my mind is torn
and this beast fed
ink-stained fingers
my thoughts have bled
and the space
still grows
inside
my head.


despise me
my defective
parts
and worthless
words
once again.


Rush
the blood flow
blushing in my face
flushed
with sickness sinking
crushed within this place
silence gushing
and i'm brushing
past the one
I can't erase.


Into the mountains
out of the wild
never
to speak again
moss tangled hair
will cover my face
unknown
will be my fragile gaze
the trees and the wind
will learn my dance
the river will speak
my sad effects
i will forget the shape of man
and time
will be known
in the moon and sky

secret stars speak
odd incantations
chant constellations
as if the derelict moon
will still
not listen.

Poet of death and dreams
words sit confounded
on his lips
while his blood
on paper
is consumed in flames


back to desiderata number one front page | previous page | next page |